I am rediscovering a ministry passion that I have. That is of the importance that minister’s wives take great strives in supporting their husband’s ministry. Through reading this blog you may or may not have noticed that my husband is a chaplain in the Army. Before that he served various roles in church ministry, and was even the pastor of a small church for a couple of years. I see the support I give him and his ministry as my own personal ministry.
When I was a senior in college, I was called to serve the Lord as a full time missionary. At the time I didn’t have a clue as to what that meant. I thought I needed to drop everything and run off to Africa…the doors never opened to do that, because I met Keith soon afterwards. I have now come to realize, as he is serving as a chaplain that I am fulfilling my call by supporting him and his ministry to the soldiers and families here.
I believe that wives are to love, support and respect their husbands in being submissive. That is what we are all called to do. I believe that God has created us to be helpers to our husbands in whatever they may do.
I recently received a comment on this blog from a wife who’s husband is considering joining the Army to become a chaplain. That comment has inspired me to post on the topic of being a chaplain’s wife. It took a few days of formulating my thoughts in my head and a dose of bravery to actually sit down and write this. Before now, I have kept this blog very light, and I will continue to do so, but I am also feeling the urging to begin sharing more of myself, more of my heart, so here goes…
- ARMY LIFE. The Army life is extremely unique. There are things that you will experience in the Army that will not be experienced in any other walk of life. It can be frustrating at times, dealing with the ups and downs of living in the Army community. But it can be SO MUCH FUN!! Especially if you don’t take yourself too seriously and learn to find humor in it.
- SUPPORT YOUR HUSBAND. The chaplaincy will effect you and the entire family. It won’t work if you aren’t completely backing your husband and supporting his ministry. I was fortunate in that when Keith was interviewing I went along with him to two of those interviews and the chaplains he interviewed with made it clear to me that it was necessary that I was in support of his decision to become a chaplain.
- THE CALL. Know what you (your husband) is called to become a chaplain. The Army chaplaincy demands a lot and sometimes the only thing that keeps us going is knowing that my husband has been called by God to do this.
- MINISTRY. It has to be a ministry, not just another job. Yes, the pay is good, especially if you’re coming from the pastorate of a small church, and the benefits are good as well. But your heart has to be focused on the MINISTRY rather then the pay, benefits, and travel opportunities.
- DEPLOYMENT. Your husband WILL DEPLOY. This means that he will be away from you and the children for anywhere from a couple of weeks (training) to 12-15 months at the time. Chaplains are in place to provide religious support for the soldiers and soldiers deploy. As a chaplain you are not (nor should you be) exempt from the hardships that the soldiers you serve have to face.
- CHAPEL. Military installations provide chapels for religious services. Chaplains serve in the chapels. In order to support your husband’s ministry, you will need to attend and support the chapel. Chapels are not divided by denomination, they are divided up into Catholic and Protestant services. Usually the Protestant services are divided into traditional and more contemporary services and there are often even separate gospel services. This means that you may worship with those from a different denominational background than yourself and the quality of services may be different than what you would expect in a civilian church. But I believe that you need to set that aside and support the ministry of the chapel as a support to your husband’s ministry.
- SOCIAL LIFE. Get involved in the social organization of the Army. You will have to interact with non-believers, but how else are you going to minister? There are Family Readiness Groups, Coffee Groups, Hail and Farewells, Balls, and other social functions. Attending these with a “happy heart” and enjoying them will enable you to build relationships among the people that you and your husband are serving.
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Monica, I really enjoyed this! You know how much I agree on the importance of being a helpmeet to your husband, in whatever arena of life God places him. It was interesting to read this perspective of military life and ministry, and I think you do a fantastic job wearing all the “hats” you have been given!
I think the best part of my expatriate experience has been our church. It is an Anglican church in so much as the minister is from the Anglican church, but we are a melting pot. The draw of this particular church is that it is the ONLY English speaking church in the region. As such, anyone who wants to worship in English comes here, sort of like the chapel you described. We are a mix of Catholics and Protestants, the long-term church goers and the newbies (like me). We have one service each week, and it seems to meet everyone’s needs. This is not a church that would work just anywhere. It is the nature of the expat community that helps it work, sort of like the Army community I’d think.
I wonder where else we will find parallels in our lives.
Thank you for your words of encouragement. As the war is taking its toll on our country it makes me pray harder as to what our true calling would be. My husband too is is looking into joining the military as a chaplain having recently graduated with his D. Min. I am hesitant at times and yet know he would love to take another leap in his calling. In reading your blog I realize that “we” are not only a team but a FAMILY OF ONE…Amen!! Thank you for your time.
Thank you! I am in a courtship with a wonderful man who is called to EMS/Fire Services (& possibly future military) & chaplaincy & we met through chaplaincy (I am finishing up my training w/my fire department’s Trauma Support Team). I want to learn how to prepare not just to be a future helpmeet but to fit into God’s plans to minister to a husband in a unique calling that’s different than even the normal challenges of a Christian marriage. This blog & comments are so encouraging for me right now! Glad I googled you!
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This is an awesome post. I so look up to ministers and chaplains and their wives. It’s such an amazing calling. God bless you and your family!
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AMEN! I am bookmarking this post, because I get asked often about military chaplaincy. (My husband is an Air Force chaplain.)
Glad to “meet” you here!
Thank you so much for posting this. I found it on a google search as I am looking for information on what it’s like to be a chaplain’s wife (my husband will be going to chaplain training for 3 months next summer.)
I’m lucky to live near a lady who had a husband in the army as a chaplain for 20 years. She’s told me all about it, and while I’m nervous to have my husband gone for so long—I know that God will provide!! Thanks for posting!